I’m going on a man-ban. Not because some horrible guy broke my heart, or because I gave it away too easily, but because too much of my self-esteem is beginning to be tied up in what men think of me and I have every intention of stopping it before it becomes an issue.
This month, I am not going to think about whether he is keen on me or whether he’ll call. I don’t want to flirt or exchange spark-fuelled banter with any man and I definitely don’t want to let them occupy my thoughts. This month is about remembering how to base my self-worth in things that aren’t related to what people think of me. It’s not going to be about over-analysing every word “he” says, whoever “he” may be or wondering whether he might be keen if you look at it from a 62.6 degree angle and squint your eyes funny. It’s about rediscovering the things that make me unique, the things that keep my friends hanging around when all manner of boyfriends and brief flirtations and less-defined things have all but dissolved into nothingness. Caring too much about what people who barely know you think – whether he thinks you’re pretty or funny or smart or talented – is going to rock your own belief in all of these things.
This month is about not caring about what the world tells me is the most important thing – the “personal” life that everyone else is far too interested in. I have a perfectly thriving personal life – I have wonderful friends (of both genders) and this month is dedicated to ignoring society’s message that this isn’t enough.
It is enough.
And I’m going to prove it.
Wish me luck (and I’ll let you know how it goes).