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So I’m about to shock a large portion of the females I know, and make numerous feminists want to hit me around the head to return me to my senses; I believe that men should have the right to check us girls/women out on the street. Let me explain why.

I have many fond memories with Liv and Addy, and I want to share one with you now. Several months ago the three of us went out to the ballet (Giselle, probably the best ballet in existence, haunting and beautiful), we then returned to Liv’s apartment and proceeded to get drunk on home made cocktails. Actually as I recall, I was extremely drunk and the others were ok. Anyway….. The next morning we dragged our hungover sorry asses to town to buy coffee, and who should we spot eating Sunday morning brunch, some of the men from the ballet company! Ok, so if you like watching ballet or not, it’s indisputable that ballet dancers are some of the sexiest men alive. Sexy men eating brunch, how could we resist. We thus choose a spot to drink our coffee that gave us a fall view of the eye candy. My hangover was greatly improved, I’m still not sure if it was the coffee or the view. If I want to enjoy checking out some sexy eye candy, why can’t men enjoy the same thing?

Of course the reason we’re all against men checking us out is because of sexual harassment, which coincidently is a big problem. Most woman have properly endured the jeers and the catcalling and the whistling. “Get your tits out four-eyes”, “Show us your hobbit-box”, “Why do you look so sad, i’m sure a good fuck would cheer you up” are among some of the more memorable things men have shouted at me in the street. One time a man even had the audacity to walk right up to and asked me if I “liked taking it up the bum?”. When I was fifteen years old, a couple of tilers working on an appartment complex overlooking my grandmother’s holiday home pulled down there pants and flashed me their cocks (this was also unfortunately my first experience to see any man’s cock that wasn’t my fathers). I want to make it clear that I’m in no way endorsing this type of behavior. However, if men can control themselves, their language and their urge to flash their cocks about, then why shouldn’t they be allowed to look.

I put effort into looking good, it makes me feel good about myself. I’m not selfish, if it makes some guy feel better to appreciate how I look, then he can go ahead an enjoy. On the condition that his enjoyment in no way brings any harm onto myself (no touching, no insulting comments, no demands).

Sometimes when a guy checks me out it even makes me feel good. Yes, it makes me feel good. A good friend of mine from school, who also happens to be extremely attractive, is often known to walk into a room looking incredibly harassed and announces that a “man checked her out again!”. I’ll ask her if he did anything negative to her, made any rude comments or bothered her, she says “no” but insists that he had no right to look at her in the first place. Ok so I’m not going to say she doesn’t have a right to be upset, but I don’t think she should be. If anything it’s complementing to be checked out in a respectful non-derogatory way. It’s like a small gesture that says “Hey you, you are sexy and beautiful. Thank you, have a good day”.

I few years ago I’d spent a long day moving flat, which involved lots of sweating in the heat. By the end of it I was exhausted, no make-up, hair all about the place, and starving. So there was nothing else to do but make a messy dash to the local chinese takeout. On my way home box of noodles swing in one hand and the other unceremoniously stuffing my mouth with prawn crackers, I noticed a young guy working at a parking-lot watching me. Feeling embarrassed a quickly wiped the prawn cracker crumbs from around my mouth, and smiled at him sheepishly. He gave me a huge smile, looked me up and down a couple of times, then gave me the thumbs up. I never spoke to him, and have never seen him again, but I’ve always been grateful to him for cheering me up when I was hungry and exhausted.

On another occasion I was walking through the city gardens, wrapped up against a cold winter day. A man approached in the opposite direction, I didn’t pay him much attention. However, as we passed he said quietly “you look great”. Before I could comprehend what he had said he was gone. It wasn’t a pick-up line, because a pick-up would require him hanging about to gather his rewards, it was just a simple complement.

Why should we all men and women be able to complement one another on the street. I’ve been complemented by women I don’t know before, and have complemented others I haven’t met in return; however, these exchanges seem to be limited to public bathrooms, the sanctuary of the woman kind. That day makes me wonder if I should just out and tell a guy when I find him attractive. However, I’ll always worry that he’ll take it as an advance, rather than just simply a nice gesture.

So my opinion is that we should all share the love and check each other out on the street. Men checking out women, women checking out men, women checking out women, and men checking out men. I get to enjoy a nice view, and hopefully the person on the other end feels complemented. If I look pretty I get to enjoy feeling sexy and beautiful, and hopefully someone gets to enjoy a nice view.

But remember children, you can look but you can’t touch.

-Lillian

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