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In my time I’ve played the clingy girlfriend. Well karma has really come to bite me in my ass. I’ve found myself landed with possibly the clingiest man in existence.

So I’ve previously told you about the freedom fighter, the older sexy political activist that I had a fling with. Well he become clingy. We had hardly started dating and he was already talking love, marriage and babies. I’m not adverse to the idea of settling down with someone, but things need to be realistic. There are few reasons that the Freedom Fighter and I realistically can’t have babies anytime soon.1) I’m not ready to get married. 2) We live in different countries. 3) Neither of us has a sold career plan at the moment 4) We only met in June! So I decided to end things with him. He didn’t take my decision very well. He has been playing the part of the heartbroken lover for around a month now. It’d take me two days by bus to reach his city, and he’s asked me numerous times to come see him (he’d help with my travel costs). I refused. I tried to avoid his phone calls and facebook messages (unfortunately I couldn’t bring myself to full out ignore them, which may have left him with some level of hope*).

So last night I received a call from him to tell him he’s in the country and he’s going to be in my city by this morning. I didn’t know people actually rushed across countries to win people back except in movies. I’ve been panicking since last night as I honestly don’t know how I’m suppose to react to this whole scenario. It simply seems ridiculous that he actually crossed international borders just to try and win me back, I don’t think I’ve even registered that this is real and not some scene from a romantic comedy.

Unfortunately for him this is not a movie and moves like this don’t work out so well in real life. If anything I find it even more off-putting. This was a guy I genuinely really liked. He was sexy, he was fun, he was outgoing, he as adventurous, he was exciting, he was caring, he was kind, he was good in bed. However, he is out of his mind clingy-crazy!

He needs to learn that unavailability is sexy. It’s one of the great fallacies of human kind . We are always chasing after people that are not available. People we think are too good for us, people with emotional hang-ups, people in different countries. We love the chase, but once someone starts throwing themselves at you they magically loose their appeal. it’s a mistake I’ve made before. When I wasn’t that interested they were all over me, when I started getting serious I was suddenly not so interesting.

Distance makes the heart grow fonder, perhaps he should of listened to this cliche. I didn’t have time to miss him or regret my decision to end things because well he’s turned up in my city.

I feel obliged to meet him as like I said he’s travelled across international borders. But my feelings of obligation are only leading me to feeling irritated with him.

How does my love-life always become so dramatic and hollywood-like?

-Lillian

*After the Flying Englishman ghosted me, something I’m still hung-up about, I couldn’t bring myself to ghost someone else. Perhaps I should of ghosted him.

**This entry has two names because I couldn’t decide which one was better!

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